I’ve been staring at this image I created for a while now. It’s a circular emblem featuring a woman in profile, a quill feather nestled in her flowing hair, the gentle glow of a crescent moon and star behind her, and wisps of what could be smoke or perhaps just the lingering trails of thought. I knew it resonated with me as the author of The Lollipop Gang and the owner of 316 Expressions. It felt like me in some intangible way.
I asked an AI to help me unpack the symbolism—the quill for writing, the star and moon for time and perhaps the backdrop of my stories set in 1970s Arizona, and the smoke for fleeting ideas. Their observations were insightful, beautifully articulating the connections to my creative work.
But then it hit me, a whisper from a deeper part of myself, a truth I hadn’t consciously acknowledged in the moment of creation. This woman… she’s more than just a writer gazing at the night sky. She’s a gypsy.
Not in the romanticized, often inaccurate portrayal but in the essence of my lived experience. My years in foster care were marked by constant motion, a series of homes, schools, and communities that became temporary landscapes of my young life. Even beyond that, as an adult, I’ve moved more times than I can readily count. It’s a thread woven into the fabric of my being – this feeling of being a traveler, someone whose roots have repeatedly had to adapt and find purchase in new soil.
And there she is, in my subconscious creation: the gypsy woman.
The star and moon, which I initially thought of in the context of my book’s setting, now speak to something more profound. They were the constant companions in those ever-changing skies above each new address. They were the celestial guides in a life that often felt unmoored.
Of course, the quill remains my instrument of expression, the tool I use to build worlds and characters. But now I see it also as the steadfast companion I carried with me, the way I could make sense of and document the different chapters of my journey. My stories became my portable home, and the characters my enduring companions.
And the smoke wisps… they aren’t just fleeting ideas. They are the trails I’ve left behind, the memories of places and people, the ephemeral nature of each temporary stop. They speak to the constant state of flux, the letting go, and the moving on that has defined so much of my life.
This avatar, this woman with the quill and the celestial backdrop, embodies a resilience I hadn’t fully recognized I was channeling. She carries the wisdom of many horizons, the adaptability forged in change, and the enduring spirit of someone who finds her home not in a place but within herself and the stories she creates.
It’s a powerful realization, this glimpse into the quiet language of my subconscious. My gypsy soul, it seems, found a way to express itself, to weave its story into the very symbol I created to represent my creative endeavors. And in understanding this deeper layer, the image resonates with me even more profoundly and personally. It’s not just an author’s emblem; it’s a quiet testament to the journey of a life lived in motion, a celebration of the gypsy spirit that resides within me.
316 Expressions 